Valentines Day is so Cliche.

It is, Solid.

its an excuse for everyone to be sweet for a day when you have to whole year to do so.

so, i've managed to actually survive this valentines day without doing anything. although yes i had plans to but it seemed like this aint really the time to do it and i got off the office at around 11pm.

Plus its inevitable to not actually remember what happened that exact date last year. i hate the feeling at night when you're already laid down on your bed staring at the ceiling. you proly know why since you experience it also. those are the times your mind works 100x than it normally does since you think about a lot of stuff, you reflect on what happened to day and what happened in the past or you're probably worrying about the future. its a nasty feeling but there's an bright side to it. it gives you the best of both worlds, you get to picture in your mind what you wanna happen and what you dont want to happen.

doesnt mean i didn't feel bad i dont have someone to spend this so called holiday. to be honest, it i did. while smoking outside my office, i saw a lot of couples. people with bouquets of flowers,cakes and gifts. they all seem so happy. walking along ayala was a bit depressing since everyone that i was walking with were couples. ( yes i walk everyday to and fro from edsa to pbcom tower, reason? go fuck yourself ) so the defensive system of my mind starts to turn on by itself and begins with the "what ifs" it brightened up my mood plus the cool breeze of the night.

Moving forward, i had a dream last night. it was about this person. so what i can remember is i surprised you by going to your office and leaving a bouquet of flowers, a card and a invitation to dinner in this specific restaurant on your desk with the card saying "Persistent lil' bitch aren't i?" everything that happened after that was just perfect to be the music video of "P.D.A. We just dont care" by john legend. we were playing around while walking, kissing everywhere. just all smiles and good times. sorry i cant remember anything else. if my crazy side kicks in, i might actually do it though.

ouch.

*puts on a smiley mask*

is there even a word that could describe this feeling at this extent.

kill me now.

you can have it all, starting with my last name.

being a young father is really a challenge.

looking for a girl who'll accept that is a challenge.

at this age, i should be fooling around and fucking around.

not care about the future and just go to school everyday.

BUT NO, i had to become a father this early.

i cant fool around nor fuck around since i have a daughter.

i spend 12-13hours/day 5 days a week in the office.

but earning this much at an age of 21? hella proud of myself.

they say "don't look for love for it will find you."

I used to say that also but now......

I say "nothing's gonna happen if you just sit around and hope that love comes, you gotta push it to the grind and look for it"

So I'm in pursuit of a girl...

who barely wears make-up but still looks beautiful.

who knows when she looks good or not.

who knows how to appreciate small efforts.

who is outgoing.

who is spontaneous.

who loves hiphop.

who can sing.

who can dance.

who is independent.

who is adventurous in different contexts.

who values friends like i do.

who lays all her cards on the table.

who is fluent in speaking English.

who has high endurance. na' mean

who isn't shy to meet new people.

who can control her drinking.

who knows how to say no to guys hitting on her.

who is thoughtful and random.

who is a risk taker.

who doesnt care if we're on PDA mode.

who is open minded.

who can easily adapt to any type of crowd.

who is down to earth.

who i can trust and trusts me in return.

who can accept the fact that if ever we do get married, they'll be my second family

this list can go on forever. i know some of you are proly thinking "bawal maging choosy kung hindi ka naman yummy". if you are, then get the fuck off this blog and go fuck yourself you judgmental piece of pathetic excuse for being a person.

if not, then continue on reading.

i'm not looking for the perfect person, i believe i can turn a girl into this ideal girl that i described and in exchange i will also change since she prolly has her own ideal guy also. of course, both ends will try but if it really can happen then just accept it. i'm in it for the long run, not just someone who'll be there when i go to bed at night but someone who'll still be there when i wake up.

lastly, no matter how busy nor how tired they are at the end of the day, will still save a little energy to just talk about their day and cuddle.

SO THIS BOY'S IS ON A MISSION. I AIN'T GONNA STOP TILL I FIND YOU.

so you can have it all, starting with my last name.

Love month? pssh.

Everybody's hyped up about this month. well everybody in love and in a relationship to be more specific.

To be honest, yes I'm also wondering if i'll get a chance to actually be with someone this coming Valentines Day which is also my daughter's birthday (yea yea, i know what you're thinking and yes I'm gonna spend some time with my daughter also). how bout me though?

What I'm thinking is renting a room somewhere in Makati either to have a private party with a couple of single friends also or to finally push through with my plan to enjoy it by myself with a bottle of jack and sinful foods. Selfish? nah. reason? someone told me to love myself first before i could love others. it was something that i forgot to do a long time ago. I give everything and leave nothing for myself. Good thing that changed already in me.

you wanna join me in the hotel? PM, DM. you know where to find me.

to Ms. Right, whoever you are, wherever you are. im'ma find you.

and you'd be able to say "pandesal lang hiningi ko, double cheese burger nakuha ko. extra cheese pa."